Monday, May 10, 2010

Chronological Age vs Emotional Age

Often times I hear, “I should know better. I am 37 years old--I am 47 years old. I can’t seem to get my life together. I am hurting everybody. What is wrong with me? I would love to have someone take me in their arms like a child and just hold me.”

These statements illustrate the distress, the quandary, in the minds of sufferers of ‘CNC’ . In some circumstances, chronological age can have very little to do with emotional age. Physical aging happens to us inevitably, whatever else is going on in our lives. We have little control about that process. Emotional age can be deterred, interrupted, or arrested, depending on sensitivity, perception, circumstance, and our ability to allow ourselves to be nurtured.

Early on, I realized that an emotional child could be any age. The problem with this reality is that it is not always (or hardly ever) recognized as such. Therefore, the expectation—the norm—is to treat the sufferer according to his/her chronological presentation rather than to nurture that person according to his/her emotional need.

It is my experience, that understanding a person from his/her emotional need—presentation, is an essential starting point to beginning the healing process.

Have a wonderful day. Peace and Love.


Peggy Claude-Pierre said...


So much of my second book will explain, in depth, exactly what you are talking about here. Would that most of the world were as "caught up" as you are. However, your moderation, unfortunately, does not include yourself. It takes intelligence to be kind--you certainly have that in spades. What you have yet to learn is how special you are to the rest of us. Love you back.

Peggy Claude-Pierre said...


I think the 'Negative Mind' does have a strangle hold--at this point in time. As Milton said, "The mind is its own place, and in itself...Can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven."

However, little by little, 'little pieces at a time', even when it is difficult, the neural pathways in the brain can and will change if you persist--if you do not allow the negative language to rule your day. Know that we are always, solidly here. Peace and love.